Rocket Scientists!
Guy buys a brand new Grand Cherokee for $30,000+, and has $400.00+ in monthly
payments. He's pretty proud of this rig, and gets a hold of his friend to do
some male bonding with the new ride. They go duck hunting and of course all the
lakes are frozen.
These two Atomic Brains go to the lake with theiIr guns, the dog, the beer and
of course the new vehicle. They drive out onto the ice. Now, they want to make
some kind of a natural landing area to attract ducks - something the decoys will
float on. Remember it's all ice, and in order to make a hole large enough to
interest a flock of ducks - a hole big enough to entice ducks to land, they
needed to use a little more than an ice hole drill...
Sooo, out of the back of the brand-new Jeep Grand Cherokee comes a stick of
dynamite with a short 40-Second fuse.
Now to their credit, these two rocket scientists DID take into consideration
that if they placed the stick of dynamite on the ice at a location far from
where they (and the new Grand Cherokee) would be waiting and ran back quickly,
they would risk slipping on the ice as they ran from the imminent explosion and
could possibly go up in smoke with the resulting blast. After a little
deliberation, they come up with the idea of lighting and THROWING the dynamite,
which is what they end up doing.
Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the vehicle, the beer, the
guns AND THE DOG ???? Yes, the dog. The driver's pet Black Lab (used for
retrieving - especially things thrown by the owner) is present and on duty.
You guessed it, the dog takes off at a high rate of doggy speed on the ice,
reaching the stick of dynamite with the burning 40 second fuse about the time it
hits the ice - all to the woe of the two idiots which are now yelling, stomping,
waving arms and wondering what the hell to do now...
The dog is very happy and now heads back toward the "hunters" with the
stick of dynamite. I think we all can picture the ever-increasing concern on the
part of the brain trust, as the loyal Labrador Retriever approaches. The Bozo's
now are REALLY waving their arms - yelling even louder and generally feeling
kinda panicked..
Now finally one of the guys decides to think -- something that neither had done
before this moment -- grabs a shotgun and shoots the dog. This sounds better
than it really is, because the shotgun was loaded with #8 duck shot and hardly
effective enough to stop the excited lab. The dog DID stop for a moment,
slightly confused, but then continued on. Another shot, and this time the dog -
still standing, became REALLY confused & of course scared.
Thinking that these two Nobel Prize Winners have gone TOTALLY INSANE, the pooch
takes off to find cover with a now extremely short fuse still burning on the
stick of dynamite.
The cover the dogs finds? Underneath the brand new Grand Cherokee worth 30-some
thousand dollars - the $400.00+ monthly payment vehicle that is sitting nearby
on the lake ice.
BOOM !
Dog dies, vehicle sinks to bottom of lake, and these two "Co-Leaders of the
Known Universe" are left standing there with this "I can't EVEN
believe this happened to me" look on their faces.
Later, the owner of the vehicle calls his insurance company and is promptly
informed that sinking a vehicle in a lake by illegal use of explosives is NOT
covered on his policy... He had yet to make his first car payment.